A Week Too Early

Guys, I always find myself in the right place. But it is slowly coming to my attention that it is most likely the right place at the wrong time. I love Robert Schwartzman. But he was always playing in KC when I was at school in SD. Or he’d be in SD when I went back to KC for breaks (winter, spring, summer or fall). This has happened with a number of bands/comedians in my flip flops between California, Missouri, and New York. I was home to re-evaluate my life while fashion week was going on. I completely missed Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe before I moved to NYC (yawn), and I moved back to KC right before a little hurricane called Sandy. I mean, where is the excitement in my life? (There is plenty of excitement in my life. I say this for exaggerated dramatization.)

Last Friday, I went down to NOLA to see my dear friend Becca for the weekend. When I got there, this is the first thing I saw:


Yeah. Pretty awesome. Except no, I wasn’t there for The Big Game. I was there to see Becca. We were going to our first Mardi Gras parades. People everywhere kept saying, “But it’s not Mardi Gras yet!” Well, I know that. But they party for like, a month in NOLA and you have to embrace it while you can. And some people who live there were like, “It’s not really Mardi Gras until you experience the parades on Mardi Gras weekend.” Well, life, guess what? My mom’s birthday is on Mardi Gras. And I have a thing called a job where I have to work on select weekends. And they selected that weekend. So, NO, I cannot be in NOLA for Mardi Gras. I made it for 7 parades, and that should be enough! So stop nagging me!

Plus, people keep saying, “Why are you back from New Orleans? I thought you were there for the game!” Do you really think I could afford to be there during the most expensive weekend of the year? A) I was staying with a friend. They all do charity work, but I’m a pretty big charity case. She and her roommates would have kicked me out before then. B) I was there BEFORE people started looting and burning shit and screaming. C) People are always burning shit and screaming down there, so I am sure I got a taste of it anyway. D) My friend doesn’t have a TV. So I would have to get to a bar like, the day before to get a spot to watch the game. And fight with crowds. Which, believe it or not, is SO not my thing. E) I was there for the beginning of Super Gras, so shut your trap!

I got to go see Mike & Mike In The Morning, LIVE, on its first day of shooting from The French Quarter. Before all of the football crazies came to town. And I got to meet the Mikes. AND I was on TV. Three times. Ask my mom. She was the only one awake to see it. I also got to go to SEVEN Mardi Gras parades. One of which was all dogs. And I got to watch the all dog parade-Barkus-in front of St. Louis Cathedral. It was awesome. I got to yell at Herm Edwards, which is something I haven’t done since he coached the Chiefs. I got to try the hottest hot sauce probably known to mankind at The Pepper Palace… and I got a free popsicle. I then purchased TUMs at a CVS on Decateur. I walked Bourbon, walked along the edge of the Mississippi, randomly saw someone I went to college with riding his bike down Magazine, did arts and crafts, had a po boy, found Becca’s new “regular” spot, got a tour of the public library, consumed a couple daiquiris, walked through airport security with Tony Dungy, consumed begneits and a cafe au lait at Cafe du Monde, and hung out with the underprivileged at my Becca’s work. Which was awesome. I danced. I yelled. I watched a girl get choked out by a dance mom. Oh, and I got to see Becca. Which makes this whole “seeing her at least once a year” thing seem more manageable. This is Becca:


Yeah, I’m missing football weekend down there. Yeah, I’m missing “real” Mardi Gras. But, like I have said before, my holidays are best spent casually with friends. I, for one, am looking forward to consuming alcohol and yelling at a TV surrounded by friends this Sunday. Preferably after a yoga class downtown. And I’ll probably wear the Mardi Gras-inspired, sparkly ESPN RADIO shirt that I scored at Mike & Mike. And some Mardi Gras beads. Because I have that experience under my belt now.

And I can.

P.S. I want the Baltimore Harbaugh to win. Even though the SF Harbaugh used to coach at my alma mater.


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